Question by Tapanga: A trouble friend needs divorce/legal advice?
This is going to be really long because I don’t know any other way to tell this without the detail. I am not going to post names, or locations…except that I am a female, and my friend, she’s a female as well. Now…my friend, she doesn’t live in the same state as me, but we met when we had training for our jobs a few years back. We got hung out a lot during the month and a half we were learning our jobs and we really hit it off. She is a bit older than me, is married and has a couple of kids. When it was time for us to return to our respected homes, we exchanged numbers and email addys and promised to stay in touch. A couple times a week we’d call or email each other, gossip, swap funny home/job stories, and even ask each other for advise on some things (I’d usually ask bf advise lol). Over the years, she never outright told me that she wasn’t happy in her marriage. Her husband works…comes home, does his thing—details were never given to me, which I was never bothered by because one, I’ve never been married and two…it’s not my business. Anyway, over the last year, she hasn’t been as chirpy as she was when we first met when we would talk on the phone. She even started asking about coming out to stay for a while with me. When those plans fell through (I was going through financial problems and at one point was sick) she slowly backed away over a course of some months…I found myself calling her or emailing her, asking her how’s life and family and one day, fairly recent…she broke down. She admitted to me through a series of emails that she isn’t very happy with her husband, and hasn’t been for quite some time. her family insists that she stays with her kids and tough it out, but she is convinced that they are just saying that because they like him. When I voiced my opinion about how I agree with her family, she then told me that I don’t know what it’s like to be “in that house with him”. He only is worried about himself, his needs and wants. He works late, she said, and when he is home, he would yell in her face when he feels she isn’t doing something to his expectations. She said he takes care of all the finances and questions her when money is “missing” or if she withdrew more than necessary. She said he would monitor her phone calls, which is why she would only call me a couple times a week, and always the nights he would work late. He would go through her phone to see who has she been in contact with and how long she has been on the phone. When he was either out, or at work, he would call her on her cell to see “what she’s up to”, but she feels he does this to monitor her, because according to her, if she doesn’t answer right away or call right back, he would blow up her phone, the house phone, or even call her mom to see what’s up. She admitted that in the past they both weren’t entirely honest with each other, but she thought that all that was going to be left behind them when they decided stayed together. She explained to me that she felt she had enough (she said this has been going on nonstop for 10 years) and she felt she did everything right. She didn’t cheat, or stray and yet it seems that he just doesn’t trust her. She said that she finally told him she wasn’t happy, she wanted out and she was taking the kids. She said he completely flipped out on her, threatened to kill her, and go after anyone she was “f**king” because no body just wakes up one day and decides to break their family apart. She said he won’t leave her, and that he would make her life a living hell if she tries to leave him. She said he took her phones, deleted all her contacts and ran to her mother, begging her to “talk some sense in my wife’s head”. She said that she is constantly being watched, and when ever he would step out the room to do whatever he needs to do, she would try and email her friends for advice. She said she hasn’t been sleeping because she is scared of what he might do, and when she is awake, he is constantly yelling at her, demanding answers as to why she wants to leave him. She said he strongly believes she must be cheating on him and wants to know the who and the where. Whether or not if she is cheating, is not my place to judge. He even threatened to call her job and talk to her boss or whoever to get his answers. She scared he would show up at her work and create hell. They are both on holiday right now, probably until well past New Years. She is at her wits end, she said and just wants out. I am really concerned for her, and was wondering is there anything she can do? Is there any legal advice? Can she have her husband sign a legal document through a lawyer stating for him to stay away from her job and associates with some kind of deal tied in so they can have a clean break? All she wants to do, she said, is to just get away. Please help? All advice is welcomed!
Best answer:
Answer by nikki
He is abusing her.She needs to go to a woman’s shelter and explain what’s going on.
They will help her.
Give your answer to this question below!
