How to file for divorce – Divorce advice for women

Question by Someone ABCD: Would the military acppet a divorce from a different country?
I’m wanting to get a divorce and i want it NOW the thing is in Texas it takes 2 months and in less then 60 days I’ll be in Iraq so i won’t be here and i need to make sure it gets finalized. there is nothing between me and my current wife. no kids no property nothing of that. Can I get a Divorce from Mexico and have it be accepted in America and the Military?

and before anyone ask there is NO SAVING THE MARRIAGE so don’t give me advice about saving it!

Best answer:

Answer by Mike
Sorry about your split up. You can do it in Nevada in like one week. A foreign divorce wont work. That said, thank you for serving your country. I have so much respect for guys like you. Just be safe and come home soon!!!

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Question by jadedangyle: Any advice on military divorce would be greatly appreciated?
In this case, specifically Navy. Key points are that he is abusive and the more control he loses, the more childish and vindictive he gets. He is currently restricted and can only leave his ship with an escort. I am doing everything I can think of to deal with this situation, but I would love any advice or suggestions of things I might be missing. Essentially, he is going to work me over any way that he can think of. (he’s already trying to keep me from any money.) I am in contact with his command, but as I don’t know them and he is definitely a wolf in sheep’s clothing, I need any information that I can possibly use to my advantage to protect my children and myself. Thank you so much for any help or advice!!
It has nothing to do with chosing work over his marriage. That at worst would be neglectful of his marriage. He is abusive. That has nothing to do with his career.

Best answer:

Answer by HollyyMarie
he’s military so of course he’s going to chose work over you, he has to
speak to a JAG officer, they’ll help you and sometimes more so than talking to his command

good luck
hollyy

edit – if he does chose work over his marriage, its NOT neglect. he has important work to do and his country, his coworkers and his family as well depends on it. you should have known that before you married him.

you say its not the problem of him chosing work over his marriage, good but im just explaining its not neglect even if it was a problem for you

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Question by justme: legal advice for military divorce….please please help?
My ex and I married May 2008. He had lied under oath that he had not had a previous marriage (he was still techinically married at the time) and he had lied that he had no children (he has a daughter with previous now ex wife). He is in the military and he will be home on leave sometime next month so I am hoping we can start this process because it’s long overdue and I want to get the ball rolling. Can anyone give me any advice on where to start or how long this process could take??

Best answer:

Answer by Karen
Yeah see a lawyer

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Question by Michelle: Military divorce and need advice?
I have been married for only 6 months and now on my way to divorce. He is in the National Guard..he took off and left me with the rent, water bill way over due, tv shut off and he changed his phone number (cell) and I have no address. What rights do I have and what am I entitled to? He keeps threatening me with shutting off my cell (its in his name) he close our bank account. I am scared to get in touch with his commander because he might get back at me somehow..but he is even online now flirting with women!! I just want to know what I should do??

Best answer:

Answer by psychedelic_harry
Sign your divorce papers and move on with your life.

Chalk this one up to a mistake….

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Question by LiNZ: Military divorce/separations pay… Need advice, please…?
My active duty husband and I have been separated since mid-September of 2009. We live in North Carolina and we can’t file for no-fault divorce until we’ve been separated for a year. He was deployed from the beginning of October through the end of February. Since we’re still legally married, he received the separations pay during the time he was overseas. If we wait the remaining five months and file for divorce in September of 2010, is he going to have to pay back that separations pay? This is what he is telling me; I honestly don’t know if he is being truthful or not. We are not legally separated, as in we have not signed anything saying we are separated.

Another question I have is that I don’t want half his retirement. We don’t have children. I don’t care about the BAH he’s getting. I don’t care what he does with the house. We both just want the divorce over and done with. Is there a way that we can file for divorce instead of waiting a year since we mutually agree on everything regarding finances? I don’t know, this is really difficult and I don’t really have a way to speak to base legal. Any advice would be very much appreciated. Thank you so much.

Best answer:

Answer by olderbutwiser
My advice is to ask your lawyer anything you have a question about, and if you don’t have a lawyer yet,ask the Base Chaplain!

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Question by C2help: 65 y.o. husband on down low. Married after he retired from military, for 14 years. Want divorce. Need advice.?
We have no kids together. After 14 years, I find out he is a cross dressing gay. I want a divorce but I am told I will get nothing. I am not entitled to his military retirement because we married after he retired. I will not get any money from his social security because of his age – he is not employable.
There has to be a way to get something out of this. I don’t deserve this pain.

Best answer:

Answer by jusbizness403
Seek alimony…. The court should grant you something

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najarro85 question : The needs of military divorce advice ?
My friend is in the National Guard in the IT and Husban a reservist. They have for over 2 years the guy has a outiside 2 children have been separated her marriage, although he is married. shes wants a divorce, but it will not sign it. Is it possible for them to speed up the process Best Answer:
Reply from

olderbutwiser
My advice is for them to get a lawyer and started the divorce! It should have no problems getting one!

Question by HmDeeDum: Uncontested military divorce–Advice please.?
This is pretty cut and dry. My husband and I are trying to avoid using a lawyer. This is a mutual divorce. We own a home, have a few loans together, and own a car together. He deploys very soon, but is willing to pay the car payment, the loan payments, and the house payment while he is deployed. I told him I will take care of the house and sell it while he is gone. However–we are both confused. If we put in writing (and notarized) that he is willing to forward me 80% his entire check for bills ONLY during the deployment, will there be any issues? Will the lawyer consider it a joke? Like I said, it’s uncontested, and we have no issues. We just want to put in writing that I will receive 80% of his check only during the year he is gone.

Also, are we allowed to keep the car and house is both of our names? We plan to sell the home soon, but the car would be put solely into my name after deployment. Is this acceptable?

Annnd more….Do we really have to list all of our debts and bills in the papers if they are irrelevant?

Yes…I probably should get a lawyer, but we already know what we want and agree on it. Thanks in advance!

Best answer:

Answer by Common sense isn’t anymore..
Base legal is FREE, go talk to them, have them write this up for you and file it in court. You can have them help you without having it become a legal battle in court, that way it is written up correctly.

Yes, you have to list everything.

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Question by Danielle_Marie: military divorce…need advice and dealing with him cheating on his family??? im 8 months pregnant!!!?
I found out that my husband has been cheating on me since thanksgiving. he has another baby on the way and a girlfriend. the girl that is pregnant by him is getting a abortion. my husband is 8 years younger than her. his girlfriend is still in the pic but I am not. I left him the day after I found out about his girlfriend. then when I got home. his baby moma calls me. he has told this girl that we weren’t married then he told her he only married me cause I was pregnant. we have been married a year and a half. but he canceled my debit card, and stopped all contact with me. like I cheated on him. he also told me he didn’t have any of his BAH to give to me cause he got it cut off. which was a lie. so I put his first sergeant on to him. and he got mad. because that told him he could get into trouble. he called me cursing and sending nasty text to me. and his girlfriends won’t leave me alone. so I changed my number and stop contacting him now he sends me a message every day from facebook. I took 380 out of his account I had it wired my name is still on the account. he owes my mom for a loan so I had to pay her. and I want my BAH that I deserve. he flipped out. he hasn’t bought his son anything. he sends me message talkin about going a wall. we both want a divorce. what am I entitled to in the divorce? I’ve never worked since we have been married. I quit school, my job, and gave my cars to my siblings to be with him. now I have nothing? why is he treating me like I cheated?why want he admit to me he cheated? I already have proof. I rather not tell the military he cheated cause I don’t want to have nothing to do with him. how do I get over this hurt and betrayal? how are we suppose to get along when I have so much hatred towards him? I am just think about my son. and what best for us. I gotta save up for a car, move into my own place(im staying with my mom in texas my husband is stationed in georgia). go back to school in the fall to be a Lvn (which I don’t want to be but a nurse is quick and good money for my son). and get a job. I need help getting on my feet. I need advice and help. o yeah. will they let him come to texas when I go into labor? who do I call on base when I go into labor?
to coerG: are u stupid. i didnt make this child on my own. he laid up with me. we have been married for a year in six months who are u to say he doesnt have to pay for anything. as long as i have a heart beat he will provide for mine. we are not communicating until after i have my son cause of the stress he causes me. so we will be married until my water breaks! i will get child support and spouse support. i got inside help my father and my uncle are in the military.

Best answer:

Answer by MovieMama
If he is not being reasonable and is not providing for his son, tell his CoC that your husband is not supporting his family, and give evidence of cheating. He is still being paid BAH, BAS, and any other allowances as married, even if you two are separated, and he at least needs to be giving you money to feed and clothe your son. The military does not mess around with cheaters, and they will not take it lightly. They will make sure he provides child support in a timely manner, paid in full every month.

See a civilian lawyer to begin divorce proceedings and custody arrangements. That lawyer should be able to help answer some of your questions, or you could make an appointment with the family center or legal office on the nearest base.

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Question Megan Fairbanks : I need some advice from someone who had experienced divorce military, preferably one that was on the seas .?
I am married to a sailor and we are in Okinawa in Japan, I want a divorce. I do not know whether the House states our case, but that’s from Alaska and I’m in Arizona Best Answer.
Reply from

mostfantasticgirl87 I think
.. that since you are the only account of the divorce are to go to your state of Arizona, but I do not really matter if you support children and baby u know anything to have. I think that’s where you are now. I would not be a divorce in Japan well. Good Luck.