How to file for divorce – Divorce advice for women

Question by CraziMommie76: Advice for a stay at home mom about to get a divorce with one car?
Haven’t worked in 3 years, we have one car, and I take care of our son during the day. Just wondering if anyone else has been in this situation and what they did?

Best answer:

Answer by Greenberg
Go to school so you can support yourself.

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Question by mimi72: I need advice about if I should divorce him? I think he was using me?
About 4 month ago my husband kick me out of his home with all my clothes( I said his home because before marriage he made me sigh a Pre-Nup agreement and I did)
We got married 3 years ago
The main reason why we are apart was MONEY, he wanted me to pay 1/2 of everything, I used to pay 1/2 of his Mortgage , utilities plus expensas.
But the big problem was when he asked me to pay 1/2 of the mensually payment of his Sport car ( his car is not on my name, he bought it before marriage) also he wanted me to help with the payments of his Credit Cards ( he owns about $ 13,000 and again I never used those cards and there not on my name) cause of that he decided we should be apart for a while or forever…
Right now I’m living at my parents home
He always make more money than I do but anyway he wanted me to pay 1/2 ! He did not care if I have some money left for me or nothing. He is very bossy and rude
I’m still loving him but he was using me! I’m very sad and upset
Now I’m not sure if he married me because he loved me or just to have somebody to help pay his bills each month.
Actually his home, Sport car, boat belong to him becuase he bought all that before marriage and anyway is in the Pre- Nuptial Agreement.
And one day he told me _ you must help me with my mortgage paymets because if you need to rent you must pay , right?
He told me if I want 1/2 of his home I should pay him $ 45,000 because he gave for down payment $ 90,000
While I was living with him we bought a lot together ex: Furniture, appliances, barbecue grill, etc
Now I’m here without NOTHING, only with my car, my clothes and little of money in my bank.
But I’m still working hard and I’m going to start saving money only for me!!
The other day I was driving by his home and 2 weekends was more than 11.00 pm and he was not home and yesterday ( friday) was a green car parking in his driveway , mmm I’m assume he is seeing another person, while I’m here very sad …
To Frank C.:
I have a Master Degree in Spanish Literature.
Next year ( September 2007) I’m going to teach In a great School , but last year when I was living with him only I got part time job . I could not find a full time…
He owns a bussiness, he got money but he does not want to share a $ 1,00
I love to help buying food , paying gas and electric, phones, utilities. But I do not like to pay 1/2 of the Mortgage because the house never is going to be mine, NEVER .Why I have to pay his mortgage??? Plus his toys, plus his Credits cards???? CRAZY?
He does not buy nothing for me, he never asked me if I have money for gasoline or if I need something, NEVER!

Best answer:

Answer by C C
Sounds like he was using you..

Be happy you two split and just think now your money can go to your bills and car in your name.

Talk to a lawyer about prenup..there maybe things you might be entitled while you were married.

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Question by justwanna: Just divorced and now I need advice about restoring my credit?
I made a stupid mistake and trusted my ex to refi the home and pay off debt for me. Not in writing just verbal(dumb). He didnt do it and now I have two judgements against me and garnishments on the way. Is there anything I can do without filing bankruptcy?

Best answer:

Answer by carlos
Maybe a consolidation loan is an option. http://simpleloansconsolidations.com

Try your bank first, and don’t be surprised if they ask a co-signer.

Good luck !

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Question by Mari3: If you want to divorce a person and there is a house involed under both names who can you talk to about it ?
if someone has been together with a person for more than 18 years they are considered married, so their house is under both names and there is other property and two children 17 and 15 yrs old. What does the person that wants to file for divorce do in order to not lose the house who can she/he call for legal advice?

Best answer:

Answer by “ORACLE”
Get a lawyer !

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Question by VIVO: Advice- should i tell my date about my divorce on the first meeting?
I really like this guy from work. I guess the feeling is mutual. He has asked for dinner in 2 days. The issue is that I am divorced and I feel that he knows this . He must have heard it from some other collegues . But he behaves as if he does not know or he does not care. I am not sure if I should tell him if it comes up. Why would he behave like that if he knows it.

Best answer:

Answer by bobby B69
Divorce is a personal thing, and many people dont want to mention it as it may hurt you. He probably does not want you to think that he has heard all these things about you, and made judgments on you.

My advice is to not bring it up unless HE specifically talks about your divorce. There is an old rule that you do NOT talk about ex’s on a first date, and trust me a divorce is like the ultimate ex.

This relationship is about you and him. I know that the divorce is important to YOU, but it really should not have any bearing on your current relationship.

Concentrate on getting to know HIM better, and ask about his past and future dreams. First dates are meant to be fun, and a chance to get to know each other a little better. I agree that your divorce is something he should know about, but not at this stage in the relationship. He does not want to feel like you are still thinking about your ex and that you have not got over the divorce. concentrate on him and make sure you have fun.

First dates are rarely times to bring up heavy things like divorce. Keep the conversation ligth and fun. You dont want to scare him away, by sounding as if you have not got over your ex.

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question : Reflections on divorce (please read details) Do you need advice tell you, a crisis reveals true character ?
Mother-in-law has suddenly five weeks after he died of cancer. My wife, sister and his father spent all the time in the hospital. They do not run, and not for a week or more to return to fois.Ma woman completely kept out of the loop and rely on his sister and father for emotional support. The only way I knew what happened when they were all said by e-mail and what happened. It froze completely on me and I could not be there in-law saw elle.Je only twice during the 12 days of his life. I had the chance to see the day, she slipped into the coma.Marié almost 2 decades. I came here for her, but she decided to leave me as a woman and man. Now the woman is leaving for a week holiday with the kids and stepfather. I do not think invité.Je not think she needs me, even if she thinks she does. I thought, wait a year before the separation. We have 2 children of primary school age. They say that the real fear the crisis caractère.Je that it unveiled a model in the future. If they can not rely on me in a crisis, so why should I should be good. I’m just babysitting and running errands and? When I wanted to give my support, I was denied apartment and screamed à.Même some of his own family could not understand how I felt cold. They were not even let me pay homage to the funeral insisté.Jehut to me: I was explicitly told not to come, there was not enough room for the hospital. For the same reason for the holiday – not enough room Best Answer: .
Liz

Response
Each has a different way of treating pain. Perhaps your wife, the shock of losing his mother left him by his parents blood away. I would not be considered an intentional release of you and offer you support. Incidentally, I wonder how this support was sincere – I mean, first, why do you say she wants me to be there for her, on the other hand, one wonders how long one must wait before his release. Sounds a bit fishy to me. This crisis has certainly proved true character of a person.

Question by Honee-Bee93: Scared and need advice about the big D.(divorce)?
I have been married for 17 years and am only in my mid thirties. I have been dealing with a husband who is very angry, bitter, neglectful, offensive, hateful, selfish, self-absorbed, prideful, abusive, and ALWAYS depressed. The list could go on. I am a devoted Christian so I feel so very evil for ending this marriage. I don’t want to. My kids are suffering and so am I. I know he isn’t happy with me anymore. He isn’t happy with anything anymore. He claims to be saved as well, but I don’t see the fruit of that at all.

I don’t have a college education or a job or even work experience. I have been a stay at home Mom since I was 19years old. I have two kids. One is a baby and the other is a teen. I am very nervous an scared of what to do first.ANyone who has been in this situation please send me some advice. I don’t know where to begin at all. I just know I can’t reach him anymore. I try everyday to help him to be close to our kids, to me. I hint and even flat out tell him how I feel.

I am not young, beautiful, intelligent or talented. But I am a good Mom and a good wife. I did everything I could to keep us together through these years. I was the model wife during his deployment to Iraq and now after all that work, I get a husband who treats me like trash.

We made a promise when we first got married that we would never put our marriage at risk by having close friendships with people of the opposite sex, I have not rescinded but he has. I can’t wait for him to commit adultery. I can’t sit by for that to happen. I saw my younger sister go through it and it hurts.
Just so you know, the abuse is not physical. I would never allow it. It is mental and verbal. VERY VERBAL!!! I am broken about this so much. I just know I can’t do it anymore. It makes my little girl cry to see us fight and hear the yelling. She is only 1 1/2 years old. She is too precious and tries to hug me when she see’ s me sad or crying to make the sad go away. She shouldn’t know about this stuff at her age. It’s wrong. Plain wrong.!!!!!

Best answer:

Answer by Ellie
Your faith in the church does not say you can not divorce if you are being abused. Abuse is not tolerated in church or by any religion. You need to kick him out, he has to leave because you have the children. He will have to pay support and alimony until you can get on your feet and find employment.
You and your children will be much happier.

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Question by Victoria: CHRISTIAN MARITAL ADVICE: I AM THINKING ABOUT DIVORCE HELP!!!!?
So my husband and I have been together for six years. When we met everything was great! I mean this man was my world (Mistake 1). I mean he was charming,professional gorgeous, athletic,and mostly importantly a man of God. In fact, he led me to Christ in the first year of our relationship. I loved this man and loved hard. We get married after three years of being a couple. And one child, pregnant and one year later, a bomb is dropped. He has BEEEEEEEEEEEN cheating like the whole marriage at that point with coworkers, strippers, etc. I watched my life whole life come crumbling apart. The person I loved so much told me he loved me only as the mother of his child. I read letters from other women.So that was a year ago. Should I be over it?? For whatever reason I gave him a second chance trying to save our marriage and family. But now a year later, I can not say that I am happy. When he asks me why I am with him I have no answer. We have two beautiful children are youth leaders in the church but I am not as excited about life as I should be. I want out but I feel like I will regret this decision. I KNOW this man has changed in my heart an spirit. Not to mention we are always together. He does not even ask to go out because he knows the trust is not there. I NEED some Godly advice ASAP sorry for venting!

Best answer:

Answer by Melissa
I found this website that I think is right up your ally. It has some great advice on all sorts of things, but the link I’ll share with you is a blog entry from some counselor? These tips and methods are for getting your ex back, saving your marriage, and stopping a divorce.

I thought it just might be what you were looking for and I hope this helps for your situation.

Check it out!

I know everyone is different and each situation is also totally unique, but I figured it was relevant for this particular situation.

http://www.everythingaboutlove.info/Save-Your-Marriage-Stop-A-Break-Up-Get-Your-Ex-Back.php

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Question by sapphire: Any advice about going through a divorce, and not wanting to be alone the rest of my life?

I’m not in a hurry to meet someone, but I guess knowing that someone thought I was interesting would be nice.

Best answer:

Answer by B V
I have been married 3 times,, ( still on the 3rd) and yes it’s very hard to imagine yourself without the person you married and thought you loved.. But there are so many other people out there who will love you and take care of you,, just don’t give up,, get busy, learn something new,, like taking a dance class, or join a book club,, take karate,, just anything to keep you moving and meeting new people!!!

as a dear dear friend told me

Chin up,, eyes clear,, moving forward!!!!

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lipid opera question : I’m getting married What do I do now, so I make the most money in divorce ?
I look forward to marry me a pretty good guy, but I sure would like to earn some reason when the divorce I have so much money as possible. Is there a certain type of clause that I can put in a contract or is there a rule that I should marry? Any advice would be great Best Answer.
Reply from

melouofs
Ugh. Ask him a marriage contract stating that you keep what is yours and get to get the best sound, if sign divorce. Watch him run.